Cochabamba: Part I

Cochabamba: Part I                                                            May 19^th

A guide to Cochabamba, Bolivia in 24 hours ---

• First and foremost – pack a sleeping bag for the bus ride.
• If you arrive before 7am, which, by bus, you will – don’t leave the bus station till at least 9. Nothing and no one will be out, yet.
• When waiting it out at the bus station, don’t go to Andy’s Café. If you do end up eating there, avoid the saltenas at all costs. And I mean all costs. They tasted like cat food wrapped in a yeasty, yellow sugar cookie. But – get Durazno con Agua (peach juice).
• When things do open up, change clothes. You’ll want to bundle up for the overnight bus ride there, but Cochabamba just gets hotter and hotter so put on shorts, a skirt, spanx…whatever, just not jeans. And wear a t-shirt. And sunscreen, comfy but airy shoes, and sunglasses.
• Once you’ve changed, check your bag and leave it at the bus station because carrying it around will not only get really old – you will be treated twice as touristy.
• Start at the markets. If you have a map, you can find it easily enough. It’s called La Cancha. Get yourself a meringue ring (you cant miss them, they look like marshmallow coated doughnuts). They are super sticky but light and not nearly as offensively sweet as they look.
• After La Cancha, go up and see Jesus and the fighting women. It will still be cool enough to walk around so go back to the bus station and from the exit, take a left and keep walking till you see a grassy, empty boulevard. Walk all the way up it and there will be a statue of Jesus surrounded by women brandishing weapons. This is to mark the bravery of the women in Cochabamba during the war for independence in 1812. The city was attacked while the men where off fighting elsewhere so the women protected the city.                                                             You get nice views of the city from up there. My friend discovered that you get even better views from standing on this meter high cement block by the statue. However, you also get embarrassing pictures taken of you when you awkwardly try to get back down. 

• At this point, it’ll be about 11:00 (give or take 30 minutes depending on how long you spend at the market). Perfect time to go to the Plaza 14 of September. It’s a lovely square with a fountain, shaded benches and mass amounts of pigeons. 
•  From here you can walk around the square till you find the corner with Café Paris. While the waiters act snooty enough to make you believe they’re actually Parisian – the crepes are fantastic. We went for a Banana Split crepe. Banana chunks, wrapped in a warm crepe that was smothered in chocolate sauce and whipped cream and then a big scoop of ice cream on the very top. Can’t go wrong.
• Once the crepes and coffee settle, catch a taxi to the Christ of Concordia statue (note – pay no more than 10 bolivianos). This is the biggest statue of ‘Jesuchristo’ in South America (yep, bigger than the famous one in Brazil). For 8 bolivianos ($1.15ish), you get a ticket up and down the cable car that carries you up a hill to the feet of the very massive, very white Jesus.  Take a rest and some pictures and that’s really all to be done up there. (Another note – try to keep wasps out of your cable car, one got in ours on the way down and it is just stressful.)

• It’ll be about 1:30 (again, give or take) and you’ll begin to realize that you got off the bus at 5:10 in the morning, it’s been over seven hours, and you’re tired. So take a taxi back to the plaza, walk straight down the road the Paris Café was on until you come to Mexico Café (they’re very creative with their names in Cochabamba). The burritos here are so good that we ate them for both lunch and dinner. I went pollo, but heard good things about carne, as well. I also recommend the Paradiso juice, which is pineapple, ginger, and crushed ice. All very cheap and very tasty. And the staff is very friendly and will recommend sites to see when asked.
• Take your time eating or go further down the street and you’ll find strings of antique shops with really cool Spanish and Amaryian leftovers.
• At about 3:30, get a taxi to La Palacio de Portales (palace of doors). The English tour doesn’t start till 4 (more 4:30) so head past the Palacio to the Natural History Museum. You’ll see some rusted, swung open gates and an over grown dirt road that leads to what appears to be a run down concrete homeless shelter with a single giant metal beetle sculpture on the outside wall – this is the museum, and yes, it is open. Really, you could miss this place, but it passes time, which is a valuable commodity in Cochabamba. If you do go inside, it’s basically three rooms. The first is filled with fossils, the second with tropical taxidermy, and the third, I don’t know because the three minutes around the taxidermy crocodile and sloth got me so panicked, I literally ran out of the museum with my own fingernail marks in my arm. I hate those things.
• By now, the tour should be ready back at La Palacio de Portales. It lasts about half an hour and takes you through the beautiful home that Simon I. Patino built for himself with his vast tin mining fortune back in the 1930’s. It is called Palacio de Portales because of the giant doors that guests would enter into the ballroom for parties. All of the décor, wood, marble, and artists were brought in from France and Italy, and it is beautiful. Patino never got to live in his palace, though. He died in Buenos Aires on his way back to Bolivia. The tour is definitely worth it. The gardens alone make the trip.
• And now, congratulations, you’ve conquered Cochabamba. Head back to the bus station and book your ticket back to La Paz. We booked ours for 11pm, but 9 or 10 would still give you plenty of time to go back to Mexico Café for another burrito or to Paris Café for a Ratatouille Crepe and some te con limon before you head out.
• Get a sleeping bag and pill and enjoy the 8 hours home.